It doesn’t seem possible that I’m inching closer to the age of seventy. After that comes eighty and ninety! Wow. At what point do I officially call myself an Old Fart? It’s not just my accomplished obedience dogs who have titles. Now at 68 I’m older than dirt, getting closer to God, and here in the South with its manners and kindness I have the title of Mam. Can I get that for you, Mam? The only place I play the helpless age card is at the airport where I’m like one of those little plastic yellow ducks in a shooting gallery. Left turn, right turn, turn around, and where the heck is gate E500 and why does my carry-on bag have the kitchen sink in it?
I’m lucky and blessed to have made it this far. Today while walking the dogs in the back yard I compared myself to the old majestic Live Oak that stands next to my house. It has grown over the years, with limbs that stretch out in every direction like octopus arms. It has scars where it has lost branches during storms and drops pieces of itself, branches and leaves and squirrel nests, down onto the green grass below. But it is solidly planted in the earth. The Oak’s roots run deep. It will take a major event to take such a monster tree down but eventually it will topple. As will I.
My Border Collie, Razz, turns five years old tomorrow. Earlier this week she was diagnosed with arthritis in her sacral vertebrae area or what I call the sacrilegious area (easier to remember), She is officially retired from doing anything except being a pet, which at the human equivalent age of about thirty-five isn’t a bad gig. She can still travel to shows with Bodie and I but doesn’t have to compete.
Razz only needs one special command now when we are traveling and that is the word, “People”. That word gives her permission to scrunch her eyes and wiggle her butt and suck up to anyone who looks her way. She Is now employed as a one girl Border Collie Goodwill Ambassador.
When I die and I’m greeted at the Pearly Gates I’ll be asked two questions. Do I want to stay there in Heaven or return to earth? I’ll answer, return. The second question will be in what form or capacity? I’d like to come back as an obedience Border Collie show dog. Ping! Another puppy is born.
Until then I’ll enjoy another year as a mossy old lady, living with three dogs and a cat. LIfe is good.